Fashion Crisis

Or
How I Learned My Lesson About Ddrinking and Driving

It was that time of the month again. Today was the culmination of a week of being slightly crabby, slightly over-tired, and slightly stressed which ends in the Colorado Board of Medical Examiners meeting. I dutifully read my 1300 + page packet filled with stories of goodness and light (well, not quite).

This morning, I got up at 5 a.m. Instead of tossing on sweats to go to the gym, I had to wear “professional clothing.” The board consists of doctors, lay people, and attorneys. We often have hearings with more attorneys and their clients whose stories have appeared in our packets. Everyone is well dressed.

Today, I selected a soft rayon blouse that has an oblique flare to mid thigh. It is taupe with Asian lettering all over it. It’s also cool enough to wear in the hot little room our meetings occupy. It’s a gorgeous blouse and looks great over a very soft pair of brown slacks. Not usually a fashionista, I was going to enjoy wearing this nice outfit.

As usual, I treated myself to a venti decaf nonfat latte for my drive down to Denver. I settled into my foggy drive with NPR to keep me company and sipped my latte. It was hot, so I let it cool a bit.

The drive seemed to take forever with the fog. I was able to move at a decent rate of speed but it still seemed like forever before I went the 40 miles to Longmont. By then, my coffee was only about ¼ gone and was still toasty but cool enough to start really drinking. So I picked it up to take a drink and proceeded to drop the entire cup, top down, into my lap.

I felt the warm coffee pool in the nice blouse. Then I felt it flood through the fabric and onto my legs, the seat, and finally settle at the back of the seat under my rear end. Damn, drinking and driving is definitely not a good thing to do.

I stopped at the first gas station and changed into the sweats that were in my gym bag in the back. I put a towel over the seat to soak up whatever coffee might ooze from the upholstery. I turned the car around and drove the 40 miles back home to change clothes. Then, I turned around again and drove to Denver WITHOUT coffee. I was late (or perhaps I should say latte) for the meeting but hadn’t missed too much. I explained my tardiness as a Fashion Crisis… wearing a non-caffeineated, non-fat latte is not professional attire.

I learned my lesson…
Next time I will carry a second set of clothes in case my latte gets rowdy.